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 Post subject: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:54 
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My dad sent me this today.

ComicalGnomes Dad wrote:

David Jenkins,
Chief Executive,
Dorset County Council,
County Hall,
Dorchester
DT1 1XJ.

Friday June 20th 2008.


Dear Mr.Jenkins,

As Chief Executive of Dorset County Council, I think you should be aware of a deliberate, systematic attempt to extort money from motorists by your ‘Dorset Parking Services’, under the cloak of ‘parking penalty charges’ which are actually illegal, but which, under the threat of a doubling of the charge for non-payment, many motorists will actually pay. Not this motorist, however.

I could write much about this – as an investigative journalist for almost 40 years, that’s what I do – but the accompanying photographs, I’m sure, will save both you and I a good deal of time and trouble.

Picture 1 shows my car, parked off the road which I believe is known as Church Knowle Road, Corfe Castle, on Thursday June 12th 2008. As you can clearly see, it is parked on a hard-standing, well inside the marked ‘double yellow’ lines (approximately a foot or more inside, by my estimation), and with no part of the car even remotely close to obstructing any part of the highway.

Despite this, your ‘Civil Enforcement Officer’ – who unfortunately I can only identify at this stage as ‘DS126’ - has issued a penalty charge notice (£70), and left it stuck to my windscreen. Neither I, nor any of my colleagues have seen such a flagrant abuse of delegated authority in this manner before, and those who have seen the photographs are incredulous that anyone could ‘ticket’ a car that was parked so far inside the lines and away from the highway. As I say, I’m sure that many motorists in similar circumstances would just cave in, and pay up on a notice which has been issued entirely illegally.

This, plainly and simply, is deception and extortion, and should be exposed – and stopped without delay. Does your ‘Dorset Parking Services’ have financial targets to meet? I will have no difficulty finding out.

Picture 2 shows cars parked on the larger hard-standing in the same road, roughly 100 yards closer to the A351. Note, this not an official car park, and is governed by precisely the same ‘double yellow’ lines. All of these vehicles are also well inside the lines, although some were actually closer to them than my car. I have numerous other photographs taken from a variety of angles.

These motorists were NOT issued with penalty charge tickets. I know this, because they were part of the group of almost 50 people which I was leading on this day.

Do I really need to go on? I hope not. I trust that you will use your authority as

Chief Executive to investigate this abuse of delegated powers, and of course to cancel the totally spurious ‘parking ticket’ which has been issued to me. A copy of this letter has been sent to Dorset Parking Services.

I have necessarily incurred costs in challenging this attempt to extort a spurious ‘parking fine’ from me: photographic paper, ink, printing, stationery, postage and time, which I estimate to be a reasonable, in-touch-with-reality £8. My invoice is attached, and I am asking you now to authorise payment without delay.

My inclination is to present the photographs and an account of these events to each of the 23 newspapers which circulate in Dorset, and to contact each of the radio and television stations in turn, so that this attempted extortion can be brought to the notice of the widest possible audience.

I trust however that your positive and pro-active response will make further escalation into the public arena unnecessary.


Yours sincerely,


along with the following pictures. He is a very funny man who will fight to the death if he feels he's been the subject of an injustice. He reminds me of me. I love my dad.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:59 
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I can't answer why the other cars haven't been done, but he wasn't allowed to park there.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:59 
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How can he prove that the car hasn't been moved when the photo was taken? Hmm? Hmm? Clearly he's lying and DS126 has done his/her job properly. About time your dad was locked up forever without charge. Probably.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:01 
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Grim... wrote:
I can't answer why the other cars haven't been done, but he wasn't allowed to park there.

Doesn't matter to me chap, but you won't convince him, this much is certain.

The last time he went off on something like this, he got £500 compensation from Sainsburys when he found a stone inside a cake.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:04 
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Sainsburys tried to charge him for having a stone in his cake?

:)

Hope he gets his £8, at least :)

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:07 
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Grim... wrote:
Sainsburys tried to charge him for having a stone in his cake?

:)

Hope he gets his £8, at least :)

No, but my mum hurt her tooth on it, and from that point on he was like a wrecking ball.

Amusingly he was placing an ad with the Guardian Newspaper a few weeks ago (I might have mentioned this before), and the numpty sales guy forwarded him a proof from the designer which included a load of comments he'd made about how my dad was a cock. Naturally, my dad picked up on this and confronted the guy on the phone, who withered and apologied and then got a bollocking from on-high for calling their customers cocks.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:11 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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I also thought "no parking" means "No parking", not "Park if you think you're ok". Which basically means he's just making it harder for the people who ARE actually screwed to get anywhere.

Sorry, but he sounds like an utter dick there.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:16 
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He's getting old now and so has plenty of time to pursue things like this. Right or wrong, I'm fascinated to see what the response will be.

I'm no traffic law expert, but he's definitely not *on* the yellow lines. Unless the bit he's on is a designated passing point on a narrow road that says 'No parking', I can't see why he can't just pull up as he has done.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:17 
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Dudley wrote:
I also thought "no parking" means "No parking", not "Park if you think you're ok". Which basically means he's just making it harder for the people who ARE actually screwed to get anywhere.
Double yellow lines mean "no obstructing the carriageway" -- note that in pic 2, you can see that there is a layby that you have to cross the double yellows to get to. I think those cars are allowed to be there, and so does the officer, as they didn't get tickets.

CG's dad isn't actually obstructing the carriageway, is he?

Do yellow lines apply to laybys? Yes, if the lines follow the kerb line into the layby. If the lines run along the edge of the carriageway then you can cross them to park in the layby.


Now admittedly, CG's dad was (rather cheekily) on the very edge of the layby; but as he wasn't blocking the carriageway at all there is a case here, I think.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:27 
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I would suggest that, as your Dad is parked over the grass verge whereas the other cars (apparently) aren't, he is in the wrong as only the most dimwitted of layby-designers would force you to park on a grass verge in order to use it. That area your Dad is parked in is more than likely just a passing place rather than a layby, which means that he IS potentially obstructing the carriageway if someone needs to use that passing place and can't.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:28 
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richardgaywood wrote:
Now admittedly, CG's dad was (rather cheekily) on the very edge of the layby; but as he wasn't blocking the carriageway at all there is a case here, I think.

You sure? Looks like he's just on the verge.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:30 

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Whereas the others are in the proper layby? That does make sense.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:34 
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I'll keep you updated, fact-fans.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:39 
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Sorry to jump on the bandwagon here ([Vote:CG's Dad]), but I don't think parking on the verge constitutes 'hard-standing' or a layby.

Fair play to him if he gets away with it (a lot of the time companies and councils will cave in whether you're right or wrong), but it doesn't make it right.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:41 
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Grim... wrote:
richardgaywood wrote:
Now admittedly, CG's dad was (rather cheekily) on the very edge of the layby; but as he wasn't blocking the carriageway at all there is a case here, I think.
You sure? Looks like he's just on the verge.
Hmm. Looking again, I think I agree now. The Mondeo in the second pic looks OK to me, the Pug estate less so.


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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:48 
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I think Picture 1 shows a strange place for a car to be. It looks hazardous.

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 Post subject: Re: My Dad is a funny man
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:13 
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GazChap wrote:
I would suggest that, as your Dad is parked over the grass verge whereas the other cars (apparently) aren't, he is in the wrong as only the most dimwitted of layby-designers would force you to park on a grass verge in order to use it. That area your Dad is parked in is more than likely just a passing place rather than a layby, which means that he IS potentially obstructing the carriageway if someone needs to use that passing place and can't.

Yellow lines could, quite reasonably, be argued to determine the bound of the carriageway (in the mind of a layperson); if it were an "official" passing place the lines should follow it.


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