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 Post subject: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:46 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6603
As a newly Fully Qualified Driver ( passed first time, 9 minor faults ), I now see the open road roll out in front of me - a new horizon of trips to the garden centre, tip and in-laws. To get me ready for this, I want to fear the following -

* Exclusive Tips and Secrets of Experienced Drivers!
* Inspirational Driving Tales of Wonder and Beauty!
* Cautionary Driving Tales of Woe and Despair!
* Some Nice Places to Drive to in the South East!

I've got a little VW Polo awaiting my first solo drive and I can't decide whether to take it to the industrial estate to do some donuts, or to find a long, straight road and see how fast I can get it. I need your guidance!


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:48 
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Chinny chin chin

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 15695
Squirt wrote:

I've got a little VW Polo awaiting my first solo drive and I can't decide whether to take it to the industrial estate to do some donuts, or to find a long, straight road and see how fast I can get it. I need your guidance!


Congratulations, you have passed your test. This entitles you to actually start to learn how to drive.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:50 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Your Mum
Congrats, buddy.

Driving through the cliffs at Cheddar Gorge is rather good fun. That's not in the South East at all.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:52 
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Congratulations!


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:53 
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Excellent Member

Joined: 26th May, 2008
Posts: 3333
I need to get round to sorting this out, I'm such a lazy belm, though. I should just bribe someone. Anyone know someone who can sort me a fake pass cert?

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:54 
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baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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Location: fife
The road over Rannoch Moor from Glencoe is one of my favorites. Try that!


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:55 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
Well done, Squirt!

Welcome to poverty and teeth gnashing.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:55 
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baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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Location: fife
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zvkeK6_Yu0


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:56 
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UltraMod

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Congrats. I suggest you get to the moussaka shop, stat!

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:56 
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Unpossible!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 38642
Drive up the M6 from Birmingham to Manchester and then cross the M60/M62 junction on a friday afternoon.

THEN you know what driving's all about.


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 Post subject: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 13:56 
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Part physicist, part WARLORD

Joined: 2nd Apr, 2008
Posts: 13421
Location: Chester, UK
Don't drive into tractors. Hope this helps!

Driving is my top priority when I get a new job. I had my theory test done but let it expire. Oops!


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:01 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22387
Congrats. Try not to kill yourself too much :D


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 Post subject: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:03 

Joined: 7th Nov, 2008
Posts: 2306
Congrats & unlucky petrol is £1.40 a litre so take your credit card


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:13 
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Level 6 Laser Lotus

Joined: 26th Aug, 2010
Posts: 2069
Aye, the best tip i have for you is drive as little as possible as it is bloody expensive at the moment :)

Congratulations on passing the test though :D

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:17 
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Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 14362
Location: Shropshire, UK
Best tip I ever heard: "Drive as if everyone else on the road is an idiot, out to kill you."

Or, as people tell me: "You should drive as if every car coming towards you is being driven by yourself."


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:17 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6603
Thanks all!

I have folks down in the West Country, and over in Wales, so I might take some scenic routes down in that direction.

I'm also well aware I don't really know much about driving as of yet, and find it still requires 100% of my concentration, so it's not actually much "fun" so far. Hopefully as I get more experience and avoid hitting any tractors, I'll start to relax.

I also intend to stalk Craster, and then brake to a halt in unexpected places just in front of him.

* awaits Craster's "crashed into an idiot who had stopped in the middle of the road just around a blind bend" story *


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:19 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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I've got a few tractors I could lay my hands on, if you want to practice.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:19 

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6093
Congrats Squirt!

I only passed back in 2008 and on returning home following the test, my dad shoved me straight in his car and ordered me on to the M25 in howling wind and rain in order to lose my motorway virginity straight off. I've never driven in such shitty conditions (other than in snow, obviously), so it was a bit of an experience. He did that though because my mum is terrified of driving on motorways and point blank refuses to do it, so he didn't want any risk of me being the same.

Also, I recommend not driving in Bristol. I've driven around Birmingham city centre and I've driven down Edgeware Road to Victoria Station in London and to Grim...'s old flat and back with no bother, but fuck Bristol. Fuck it up Brunel's shitty fucking arse.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:20 
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Comfortably Dumb

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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flis wrote:
I need to get round to sorting this out, I'm such a lazy belm, though. I should just bribe someone. Anyone know someone who can sort me a fake pass cert?


If you change your name and appearance, you can just have my licence. ;) I've not driven in over 2 years now and don't miss it. I'd probably need refresher lessons or something if I got another car as I was doing less than 1000 miles a year so I was hardly well-practiced.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:21 
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I thought if you had three or more 'minor errors' you failed? I had two errors and was counting my blessings.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:22 
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Sleepyhead

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 27354
Location: Kidbrooke
Squirt wrote:
I want to fear the following...


No, really, they're not that bad.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:22 
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Unpossible!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 38642
Zio wrote:
I recommend not driving in Bristol

:this:

We went to Devon a while back and on the way back I thought visiting Bristol might be nice.

WRONG. Never ending traffic jam.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:24 
SupaMod
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Commander-in-Cheese

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Craig wrote:
I thought if you had three or more 'minor errors' you failed? I had two errors and was counting my blessings.


Nah, I think it's about 12, or 3 in the same section.

Nice one, Squirt!

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:25 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6603
Craig wrote:
I thought if you had three or more 'minor errors' you failed? I had two errors and was counting my blessings.


My big stack of paper and certificates and reports doesn't say, but I think it's something like 15 in total or more than 3 of the same one. I got one in seven categories and two in one.

Edit - Hmm, Craster and I think different. I was just pulling mine from my arse, so I've no real idea.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:29 
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Yes, I'm probably thinking in the same section. Or my instructor lied to spend more time with me make me perfect.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:30 
Congrats.

There's some nice windy single lane national speed limit roads on the marsh on the south coast. It's fun driving around there pretending you're a rally driver.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:35 
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Master of dodgy spelling....

Joined: 25th Sep, 2008
Posts: 22623
Location: shropshire, uk
DavPaz wrote:
Drive up the M6 from Birmingham to Manchester and then cross the M60/M62 junction on a friday afternoon.

THEN you know what driving's all about.



Or any Bank Holiday!!

Congrats..

I love driving in the Lakes or Scotland for views..

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:36 
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Noob as of 6/8/10

Joined: 6th Aug, 2010
Posts: 5568
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Congrats.

Tips?
1. If you're stopping at a junction to turn right, please don't forget to indicate well before you stop. I know you've just been taught to do this, but so many people soon forget in the excitement of being allowed to go solo, and one of these days I'm GOING TO FUCKING KILL ONE OF THEM .... oh, I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me.

2. Don't be a show off. You're (hopefully) in control of a heavy metal box on wheels which is just waiting for you to behave like a twonk so at worst it can either kill you, or someone else, or someone else's metal box on wheels/other property. It takes but a few seconds to be a twonk and possibly a lifetime to get over it.

3. Just be courteous to other road users, regardless of what twonks they may be. It's actually nice to be nice to other road users, who in turn may well be nice to you. Behaviour breeds behaviour, you know.

Apart from that, enjoy it while you can.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:39 
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Unpossible!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 38642
Also - Motorway junction roundabouts - very scary the first time. That gent in the white van is trying to encourage you to choose a lane with his friendly honking. Thank him with a wave!


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 14:40 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22387
Oh, and if I stop to let you through, blinding me by flashing your headlights is not the cheery thanks you think it might be...


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:02 
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Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 6183
Figure out how wide your car is so you can drive up narrow streets with oncoming traffic & still feel comfortable. It'll save you sitting there letting folk through like an eejit on a road that two buses could drive up.

If a cyclist stops pedalling they're potentially about to manouver & not all of them do lifesavers before they do!
Oh aye & please give cyclists a wide berth when you pass them, even if they're acting like belming fucktards, being [near] clipped is nae fun :(

Same with horses except every one of them AND the people that ride them are mental!

Low gears, cutting corners & twisty roads are bestfun. Especially downhill with a huge drop to one side. The road to Seil Island springs to mind as do the singletrack roads around the Borders :)


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:09 
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Level 6 Laser Lotus

Joined: 26th Aug, 2010
Posts: 2069
Which part of Wales are you family around? There are some stunning driving roads that i know of in South and Mid Wales, i would avoid North Wales as they are all married to their sisters up that way :S

Its a very well known true fact that Wales may well have the best Roads in the known universe.

This is a fact generated by the Factometer 3000, which hasn't been wrong yet!!

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:13 

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6093
Don't buy a relatively expensive family car with alloy wheels as your first car - otherwise you may cry when you kerb the fuck out of the alloys within two weeks of picking the car up, or when you accidentally scrape the passenger side door on a concrete post.

Not that I would do anything like that, oh ho no... :S


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:17 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22387
Yeah buy a cheaper car than someone has already driven in to the ground.

I think Zio's is for sale at the moment ;)

:D


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:18 

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6093
(Most of) the damage has been repaired! It's in good nick for a 4 1/2 year old car! Yours for £7,000?


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:22 
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Noob as of 6/8/10

Joined: 6th Aug, 2010
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There's nothing wrong with having a slightly distressed vehicle. I swear by it as it makes me less precious about it.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:25 
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Joined: 12th Apr, 2008
Posts: 17966
Location: Oxfordshire
Be sure to have breakdown cover. You never know when you might need it.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:32 
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Chinny chin chin

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 15695
Kern wrote:
Be sure to have breakdown cover. You never know when you might need it.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 15:58 
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baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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Location: fife
^ a kalmar, earlier.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 17:23 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6603
My sister lives around Builth Wells ( probably spelt wrong ), so not far from the Brecons, I think. Lovely part of the world, but one hell of a schlep from where I am at the moment. A long weekend in summer might be nice!

My car is a '98 Polo which has had a few dinks already, so I'm not terribly worried about reversing into the odd pillar ( which I almost certainly will do ). I intend to do the breakdown cover thing tomorrow - I can get it through my bank account, which might work out cheaper ( as I get some other goodies too ).


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 17:24 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69707
Location: Your Mum
Squirt wrote:
Builth Wells

Why have I heard of that?

[edit]Is it where the Royal Welsh showground is?

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 17:26 
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Chinny chin chin

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 15695
Squirt wrote:
I'm not terribly worried about reversing into the odd pillar


If you hit a Pillar, chances are you'll take out a Barker and a Beilby as well.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 18:48 
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Ticket to Ride World Champion

Joined: 18th Apr, 2008
Posts: 11895
Cars are 3D, so if you want to go around something (eg, a bus), you have to position yourself accordingly, not drive right up behind it and then try and pull out, this does not work because:
1) the fucking bus is in the way.
2) You can't see round the bus, it is in the fucking way.
3) you are too close to the bus, so can't manouvre without going into on coming traffic, because the bus is in the fucking way!
4)(optional) You are a woman in a 4x4 who has absolutely no idea how big her car is, and really doesn't care, and the bus is in the way.

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 19:46 
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Gogmagog

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 48892
Location: Cheshire
Using the mirrors is a sign of weakness.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 20:20 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69707
Location: Your Mum
Bobbyaro wrote:
Cars are 3D, so if you want to go around something (eg, a bus), you have to position yourself accordingly, not drive right up behind it and then try and pull out, this does not work because:
1) the fucking bus is in the way.
2) You can't see round the bus, it is in the fucking way.
3) you are too close to the bus, so can't manouvre without going into on coming traffic, because the bus is in the fucking way!
4)(optional) You are a woman in a 4x4 who has absolutely no idea how big her car is, and really doesn't care, and the bus is in the way.

The problem in this situation is, of course, the bus.

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Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 21:25 
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baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 24136
Location: fife
Yes, the answer to this problem is to be on the bus. Especially in case 4)


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 22:21 
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Level 6 Laser Lotus

Joined: 26th Aug, 2010
Posts: 2069
Grim... wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Builth Wells

Why have I heard of that?

[edit]Is it where the Royal Welsh showground is?


Yup that's it exactly, it where all the sheep fiddlers go to show off in front of royalty :)

Squirt if your planning on a long weekend that way i would suggest heading south of that area for some beautiful scenery in the Brecon Beacons and possibly head to/back (either or) via Cardiff, bloody good night out, if you give advance notice of which weekend i am sure the Welsh Massive (erm...forum members that is :DD ) will pop out and show you what real Beer is like, have you tried Brains Skull Attack before?

I am living in Essex now but will make sure i am back in the homeland for a Cardiff meetup, if people were intrested

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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 22:24 
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Chinny chin chin

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 15695
kalmar wrote:
Yes, the answer to this problem is to be on the bus.


Nobody came here for a lecture on communism.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 22:27 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69707
Location: Your Mum
Slightly Green wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Builth Wells

Why have I heard of that?

[edit]Is it where the Royal Welsh showground is?

Yup that's it exactly, it where all the sheep fiddlers go to show off in front of royalty :)

/is posh

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I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


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 Post subject: Re: We who are about to drive...
PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 10:16 
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Ready for action

Joined: 9th Mar, 2009
Posts: 8548
Location: Top Secret Bunker
I think the first time I drove after passing my test was with myp and Ange in the car. I only mounted the curb once, and I parked on a street with no cars and was still about 5 foot away from the pavement. :D
My first day at work was two days later and I drove on the motorway fo the first time. It is a lot less scary on a motorway when you are the one driving. Just remember that if you are going to change lane, check the lane you are moving into and also the one next to that. You don't want to be halfway into the new lane only to fine someone else is trying to do the same thing. Of course, this can't help if someone doesn't indicate and just suddenly swings in but at least it gives you a fighting chance :p


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