Be Excellent To Each Other

My brother and sister-in-law have two kids. For some reason, this makes them better people than me. For example, yesterday (Sunday), they came round with the kids at around 9:30AM. I was brushing my teeth when they arrived having just got out of the shower after a small lie-in to around 9AM (it was Sunday!). Cue the snide remarks about sleeping in, and how they've been up since 6 with the kids.

A strange thing also happens when they need a babysitter. They'll ring you up out of the blue, usually early evening when you're just about to carry out whatever plans you have made and guilt trip you into babysitting, making it seem like there is genuinely NOTHING more important that you could possibly be doing than babysitting their children so they can have some much-needed relaxation time.

Also, currently I'm studying on what is probably one of the most difficult courses you can possibly do (a law degree condensed into a year - ask MaliA!). I recall complaining about the workload to my brother a few months ago only to be met with "pff, try having kids!" or something. It seems nothing is more difficult and worthy of sympathy than having to deal with children that you fucking CHOSE to have.

There are more examples, but I really can't be arsed to list them. Anyway, does anyone else think some people with kids seem really self-important and act as though they're the first people ever to have kids?

Tell them to get bent?

I do!

Under my breath.

Isn't that why they have them in the first place?

( )

You wouldn't understand, Wogan: you don't have children.

Oh snap!

Just to add, I'm sure the folk on here with children aren't self-important gashflap-faces, I'm basically moaning about my brother and wondering if anyone else knows similar people.

Haha! I'm pretty sure this line has been used on me before.

The kids are the most important thing in the world to them, and I can understand why that makes them think other people should feel the same way. No reason why you can't make clear that you don't care though. Just tell them that you hate your nieces/nephews, I can't see that causing any family difficulties at all.

God, I hate that one. I had a mate who argued I couldn't have a opinion on something children-related (I forget what it was) until I had one of my own. Er, I can have an opinion of whatever I like - it might not be as well-informed, but I'm still entitled to it.

Well, it's not true of all of them.

I guess doing a good job of raising kids is important, and should be taken seriously.

Maybe it's just easy to take it so seriously that you loose perspective.

Except in Jonarob's example they just wanted to dump the kids on him so they could go out, not really the same thing.

I have encountered people like your brother but i would like to think that me and the missus are different. We percieve Isabelle as a blessing (but not in the religious sense, she's just ace) rather than a chore or burden. While it has had a profound effect on our lives in all respects, we knew it would do and readily accepted it. We don't see our friends, like myp and ange, any where near as much as we would like.
I don't think i have ever said to any one anything along the "you don't have children etc..." lines, probably because Isabelle has been an absolute joy and, dare i say it, easier to handle so far. She sleeps through the night most nights and is very well behaved for an eight month old. i'm sure we will have tougher times but we are not ones to complain about how tough it is to raise a child. My girlfriends sister is struggling no end with her two but i personally put that down to their choices rather than the little girls. We have a routine and cope very well.
The people who says the kind of things you have described are martyrs to thier children.

Hello! I'm a parent, and it's fucking hateful! I don't think I'm particually parent material. Anyhoo:

I do that, mainly because it's true. Lie-ins are things I pretty much can't remember. I do it more jokily than snidely, I hope.


Nothing "normal" people do is more difficult, trust me. Also, not everybody chose (but you chose to do your course). Worthy of sympathy, well, not at all.


Quite how you missed off pushchairs is a mystery.

In short: Don't do it.

This is the same as dog owners. There are some good ones, and then there are some bad ones that have managed to leave the biggest turd I’ve ever seen at the top of my drive on the street. Seriously, that dog needs looking at!

You’d think that a Hippo or Rhino had been caught short judging by the size of it.. Anyway, I digress..

Absolutely, but I think a lot of people also go along with the idea that having children is the only reason we're on this planet, and actually are being quite imperious when they mock an adult for being able to have a lie in or practice an instrument or piss off into the mountains for a week. The idea that you might have ambitions that don't culminate in raising a family and owning a home is almost alien to a lot of people. Wanting to do those things is a perfectly valid, worthwhile and sometimes admirable goal, of course, but setting yourself goals that matter to you as an individual (perhaps academic or artistic ones) seems to be a hugely devalued concept...

If genes are not passed on, then the vessel serves no purpose.

I believe that's the problem Cornwall has, isn't it?

Being a cyclist who lives opposite a Primary School, my biggest parent hate is the 4x4 driving Mums with their precious solitary child in the passenger seat. Since they're frequently incapable of driving these enormous machines, they endanger me EVERY DAY I try and cycle down my road, as well as the parents who walk their kids to school (good for them) who have the terrifying task of trying to cross roads filled with these maniac tank drivers. But, you know, it's ok cause "it feels safer for me and my child being in a people carrier". Selfish arseholes - who gives a fuck that cyclists and everyone else's child is being endangered by you driving that fucking thing, as long as your precious little offspring is that little but safer. Fair enough if you've got 4 kids and 2 dogs in those things, but any less then these parents need a fucking slap!

Disclaimer: Grim... I know you've got a LandRover, but you use it to razz about in the countryside (fair play), not to take your kid to school in the morning, I hope? Please?!

Pics or it didn't happen.

In a strictly biological sense, aye. But in the sense of enjoying life: meh.

I wonder why we still believe that, when we as a society has evolved past and abandoned pretty much every other expression of primal instinct.

I can barely see how anybody who actually had such a reductive view of human life could function as a parent...

People can get equally as snooty about any of those things, though. Everyone tends to think that what they're up to is pretty good, else they wouldn't be doing it.

What if the vessel leaves behind information, or art?

I cannot wait to take the Grimlet to school in the Tomcat.
However, I agree with you totally (as long as you're saying it's the drivers that are the problem and not the cars).

Perhaps, but in my personal experience it's exactly as described.

Barring possibly the "only reason we're on the planet" bit of philosophy, because I don't think my brother and co have thought about it that deeply - they're just doing what seems right because all of their friends are doing it.

The cars are partly to blame, purely because they're more difficult to see past/over/around. The drivers are certainly the main problem, though.

Agreed.

Oh aye, there are plenty of discussion forums out there full of people who'd think VHEMT was a bit too soppy, and absolutely despise all "breeders" as "cowards" who aren't doing anything worthwhile with themselves. Both extremes are pretty damned repugnant.

I hate the ones who park all over the double yellow lines near schools, the same ones put their to try and help you not run over THEIR FUCKING KIDS

I'd like to add that I hope to have a kid or two one day, but I'm not going to be a cunt about it, and I'm gonna make damn sure I enjoy my life however the fuck I want to before I choose to burden myself and then make everyone else feel guilty about it.

Yep, fine with that. If someone can drive one properly and are happy to pay the higher taxes to counter-balance the environmental cost, then go ahead. I've seen the pics of you nailing around the countryside in your LandRover so I know you can handle yours properly

I put that blame on the people for using them in silly situations, though.

Aw, you're cute. The tax on the Tomcat is so low it might as well be free, and the tax on the Mundano is free.
We could talk about how Car Tax is by far the worst way to "environmentally" tax a vahicle, but that's another topic, methinks

Like "on the road". Unfortunately the majority of them (land rovers excepted) are actually designed to be primarily used on the road, and will be used for purely that.
So there is still blame on the actual vehicle - not fit for purpose.

Anyway, back to the topic, sorry

I try to avoid cycling anywhere near roads during parent's rush hour these days.

Walking to school was great fun anyway (unless it was raining). By driving Wee Daisy they're depriving their wean of banter with their pals, a bit of exercise & important road safety skills.

Absolutely. It's still the car blocking your view, though.

The only other complaint I really have against such large cars is their ridiculously highly placed headlights, and modern car manufacturers' insistence headlights should be brighter than the sun. Having one of these cars driving up your arse is intimidating and distracting to say the least.

Unless they're driving too close there shouldn't be a difference, as the lights have to be set at correct heights for an MOT pass.


All Land Rovers are designed primarily for on-road...
MODS!

Hmmmm... well, I cycle everywhere (never learnt to drive) so what do I know. In my perfect world there would be virtually no cars of any type on the roads!

Anyway, yeah, parents RANTRANTRANT...

I try not to get too wound up about the 4x4 crowd, but what really pisses me off is that if I were to set off to the shops around about... now, I'd be stuck in a mass of traffic because everyone drives their kids to school. Let them fucking walk.

A) they're always driving too close (not the fault of the vehicle)
B) they can be within the allowable range of headlight height, which is quite large, and still be completely incompatible with normal cars. For example, the new Range Rover's headlights are exactly in line with the rear view mirror on my (not exactly tiny) Berlingo van. This is wrong and dangerous.
Same goes for bumper heights and all the rest of it.



Tomcats excepted?

I was at a barbecue on saturday with a largish group of friends, most of which now have children. Out of 8 couples at the event, only us* and one other couple are childless. Consequently, the entire day was dominated by the rugrats and their delightful antics. Which is fine. What isn't fine is me being frowned at for not immediately springing up to play with said preschoolers. Forgive me, but a clumsy 30 year old with 3 burgers and 4 beers inside of him is probably not the best playmate for a 2 year old. And before you lot frown at me for drinking at a 'family' bbq, MrsP was frowned at for not drinking, as if she was a dangerous freak and practically forced to take a glass of wine

So, yeah. Parents: Weird.

*MrsP and I, obv.

Indeed - parents can be disturbing when they begin to exhibit pack behaviour.

They're also all mental and on powerful psychoactive drugs, in my limited experience.

The school opposite me (with the council) are banning school car drops within a certain perimeter between set times from next year. I cannot fucking wait!

They invariably are driving too close. The sense of safety parents feel in these cars practically encourages them to drive right behind the car in front. It may be me seeing patterns where there aren't any, but I seem to get tailgated by SUVs & 4x4s more often than any other vehicle type.

Parents scare me..... oh wait..

Also, since I seem to posting again... walking to school.

All kids should walk to school, except the ones with wheels. And before anyone bleats about living too far away to walk, boo-fucking-hoo. Move closer or change schools.